FORE Magazine

Top Menu

  • About Me
  • Contact Us
  • Home

Main Menu

  • Current Issue
  • Profiles
  • Sustainability
  • Travel
  • 19th Hole
  • Classic Course
  • FORE Her
  • More
    • Know the Rules
    • Handicap Hints
    • SCGA Junior
    • Where Are They Now?
    • News
    • Public Affairs
  • scga.org
Sign in / Join

Login

Welcome! Login in to your account
Lost your password?

Lost Password

Back to login

logo

FORE Magazine

  • Current Issue
  • Profiles
  • Sustainability
  • Travel
  • 19th Hole
  • Classic Course
  • FORE Her
  • More
    • Know the Rules
    • Handicap Hints
    • SCGA Junior
    • Where Are They Now?
    • News
    • Public Affairs
  • scga.org
Spring 2016The Podium
Home›Issues›Spring 2016›Golf The Greatest Game: Despite Subjecting Us to More Ups and Downs Than Riding a Pogo Stick, We Love You

Golf The Greatest Game: Despite Subjecting Us to More Ups and Downs Than Riding a Pogo Stick, We Love You

By Bill Dwyre
April 1, 2016
5461
0
Share:

DwyreForget Charles Dickens and his two cities. This is the tale of two golf rounds.

First came Escena, a gentle and kind-looking layout near the Palm Springs airport. The sun shined brightly. The usual swirling winds of the desert were napping. It was a perfect day, and I fell for it. Again. The classic golf setup. If ever there was a day to break 80 again, this was it.

Halfway through the first nine, the 80 became laughable. This wasn’t Augusta National, but then, I sure wasn’t Jordan Spieth. The delightful day became a dreary round of dreaded snap hooks, banana balls and chunked chips. Near the end, I prayed that one of the traps in which I landed had been enhanced with quicksand.

There is a place I go for my solace. In the middle of these rounds, when everything that should be going right goes left; when sand traps jump out of the middle of fairways to grab my ball; when swinging the driver feels as if my wrists and elbows are going through a divorce, I am always soothed by the words of the late, great L.A. Times Columnist and SCGA Hall of Famer Jim Murray. He was an incomparable realist, and romantic, about the game.

He once wrote that golf “never lives up to its promise … it’s not a sport, it’s a bondage.”

He also wrote of the game that “it plays with men and then runs off with the butcher.”

I have long ago learned that golf is not a sport, it is a Jekyll and Hyde. Trust it and it will slap you down. Expect the worst from it and it will hug you. The only thing predictable about it is that it never will be.

If you truly love golf, you have to truly hate it. Those opposing emotions drive its attraction and drive you crazy.

Golf loves you almost as fast as it leaves you. It coaxes you out into the sunshine and the perfectly manicured grass. What could be so hard? A tiny ball needs only to be hit by a large, scientifically engineered club. And then that tiny ball ends up under rocks or in the middle of rivers or under a chaise lounge in somebody’s back yard. Is it really laughing at you as you peer over the fence?

All this legend about the Scots creating this game on their fields while they herded their sheep is a pile of dung. The game was created by the Marquise de Sade.

A few days after the Escena episode came a trip back to more familiar territory, good old Sierra Lakes in Fontana. Nice course, reasonably challenging, usually in very good shape. The general manager ought to be spanked for allowing fivesomes, and even an occasional sixsome. But other than that, a comfortable round in a comfortable setting.

I was determined to forget Escena. I heard an interview with Spieth after he shot an opening-round 79 at Riviera and he shrugged it off as just one of those things. It happens, he said. It just happens to we mortals a lot more.

I got to the fifth hole at Sierra Lakes 2-over par. Not bad, not great. It was like so much else in golf. If you are a 9 handicapper, you feel good about yourself. If you are a 15, you have little hope of getting to single digits and you feel rotten about yourself. If you are a 12, you are mostly just confused.

The fifth hole at Sierra Lakes is about 400 yards, is slightly uphill and always seems to have demanded one more club than you have just hit. It is rated the toughest hole on the course.

I drove it my old man’s usual 200 yards, then took out a five-wood to traverse the remaining 205.    At this point, an alien being took over my body. The swing was smooth, the ball jumped off the club and even sounded good in doing so. Suddenly, I was in foreign territory. Not only was the ball heading right to the pin, but it was going to get there. On the green in regulation. Pop the champagne corks.

From ten feet above the hole, on a green running about 10 on the stimp meter, I was in foreign territory again. Putting for a birdie. It was one of those putts you wish you didn’t have to hit, but just blow on it. The only way to stop the ball was with the hole.

And so I did. Clunk, rattle, birdie.

Escena’s 97 became Sierra Lake’s 85. The sun glistened, the birds chirped and the world was a swell place again.

Is golf a great game, or what?

Previous Article

Tahoe Golf: God’s Vacation Spot

Next Article

Twin Passions: Both Golf and Basketball Called ...

0
Shares
  • 0
  • +
  • 0
  • 0
  • 0
  • 0

Bill Dwyre

Bill Dwyre was the sports editor of the Los Angeles Times for 25 years and a sports columnist there for the last 9.5 He has covered all the major golf tournaments and learned nothing that helped his game at any of them.

Related articles More from author

  • Fall 2022The Podium

    The Single Life: The Simple Pleasures of Being “That Guy”

    October 25, 2022
    By John DeGomez
  • ChrisO'Donnell Teeing Off
    ProfilesSpring 2016

    Scent of a Birdie: A Q&A with NCIS: Los Angeles Star Chris O’Donnell

    April 1, 2016
    By Robert Kaufman
  • rules tsar
    Know the RulesSpring 2016

    Rules Tsar: Easy Fixes I’ll Make When I’m in Charge

    April 1, 2016
    By Ken Van Vechten
  • Summer 2016The Podium

    The Unforgiven: Ruminations on a Sissy Game that Came Back to Bite

    July 1, 2016
    By Bill Dwyre
  • Fall 2019The Podium

    Elegance and Eloquence: Remembering Jack Whitaker

    October 15, 2019
    By Bill Dwyre
  • FeaturedThe PodiumWinter 2023

    Changing of the Guard: New Galleri Classic Set to Debut in the Desert

    February 7, 2023
    By Judd Spicer

Leave a reply Cancel reply

Recent Posts

  • FeaturedFirst CutWinter 2023

    Talking It Out: What’s a Round Without a Recap?

  • At The TurnFeaturedWinter 2023

    Pins & Needles: An Ancient Remedy for an Age-Old Problem

  • FeaturedGolf GroupsWinter 2023

    Club Spotlight: FOREGALS Golf

  • FeaturedTravelWinter 2023

    Cactus Makes Perfect: Travelin’ Joe’s Top Six 36-Hole Arizona Desert Courses you can Play

  • Classic CourseFeaturedWinter 2023

    A Return to SoCal: The U.S. Open at LACC is the Start of Something Big

FOLLOW US

Facebook 0Fans
Twitter 0Followers
Instagram 0Followers
Youtube 0Subscriber
  • Recent

  • Popular

  • Comments

  • Changing of the Guard: New Galleri Classic Set to Debut in the Desert

    By Judd Spicer
    February 7, 2023
  • New Year’s Daze: Looking Forward and Looking Back at your Handicap

    By Kevin O'Connor
    February 7, 2023
  • Grass by Design: Pure Research Yields New Strains of Drought-Tolerant Grass

    By Craig Kessler
    February 7, 2023
  • Best Ball Bar & Grill: Woodley Lakes GC Gets a Big Culinary Upgrade

    By David Weiss
    February 7, 2023
  • Making a Future in Golf a Reality: Skylar Graham and the Pathways Internship

    By Ken Van Vechten
    February 7, 2023
  • The Diva Golfer

    By Azucena Maldonado
    January 31, 2017
  • The USGA’s Major Proposed Changes to the Rules of Golf

    By admin
    December 14, 2017
  • Stand By Me: Temecula Native Joe Skovron On Life As Rickie Fowler’s Caddie

    By Jonathan Coe
    October 26, 2016
  • Watching the Tiger Watchers

    By Andy Brumer
    February 20, 2018
  • Remembering Jim Murray: Best of the Best

    By Bill Dwyre
    February 14, 2017
  • Julie
    on
    November 13, 2022

    The Single Life: The Simple Pleasures of Being “That Guy”

    Thanks for this. I ...
  • free proxy list
    on
    December 5, 2018

    Top 4 College Golf Names You Need To Know

    Hello,I log on to ...
  • Adela C. Garcia
    on
    November 17, 2018

    Revolutionizing the “Ladies Club”

    Azucena Maldonado is a ...
  • Rose Sauceda
    on
    November 15, 2018

    Revolutionizing the “Ladies Club”

    Congratulations my lovely Amiga ...
  • Judy Carls
    on
    November 15, 2018

    The Gilded One: Eldorado CC

    Excellent magazine..thank you Judy Carls LPGA ...

RECENT COMMENTS

  • Julie on The Single Life: The Simple Pleasures of Being “That Guy”
  • free proxy list on Top 4 College Golf Names You Need To Know
  • Adela C. Garcia on Revolutionizing the “Ladies Club”
  • Rose Sauceda on Revolutionizing the “Ladies Club”
  • Judy Carls on The Gilded One: Eldorado CC
© 2016 FORE Magazine About Us | Contact Us | Advertise